Thoughts from the Mills Brothers on Smoking

 

Thoughts from the Mills Brothers on Smoking

 

Compiled by Valerie Mills Hunt

 

As I interviewed and collected stories, I heard several told about smoking.  My first thought was, these are not the kind of inspirational stories I was hoping for.  But then, I realized I was being short-sighted.  I believe we all have our Achilles Heel – weaknesses that can hold us back from achieving if we let them.

 

The example that my dad and uncles set for me, was that they each learned and in their own way, overcame during their lifetimes.  What an amazing example that is to me!

 

 

Uncle Glen mentioned in one of his stories that he did not drink coffee and I had never seen him smoke.  Since other stories had come  up in other interviews, I asked him why,  when his other brothers and dad smoked,  he didn’t.  This is the story he told summed up in my words:

 

One day Mavin and I were out by the fence and Mavin pulled the bark off and rolled it up like a cigarette, lit it and started smoking, something he had been doing for quite a long time.  He had pulled the cedar off the fence for a block in both directions with the fence closest to the house as the starting point. He would smoke anything he could get his hands on.  I may be wrong, but I don’t remember smoking with him.  Suddenly, dad appeared and decided he would teach us a lesson.  He took a cigar and broke it in half, lit each half and made us boys partake. 

 

I looked over at Mavin and he was smoking like an old man who was used to it.  But not I.  I got so sick I felt like I was going to die.  I think that is why I never was tempted myself.

 

 

Mavin’s Story as told by Brent:

 

I believe my dad started smoking years before Uncle Glen’s story took place. Growing up, I remember Mom, Sherilyn and I asking Dad to quit smoking many times. It never worked.  When Cosette and I started having kids, we asked Dad not to smoke around them.  He was always respectful of our wishes, even choosing to smoke outside his own home when we were over or while they were babysitting. 

 

Dad had a special relationship with Tyler.  Maybe it was because he was born premature and had health issues, but Dad was very protective.  I remember dropping Tyler off in his car seat at 6:30 in the morning with mom cooking dad his breakfast and Dad holding Tyler saying, “Just you wait.  Grandma will get a bottle for you and an egg for me.”

 

When Tyler was 3-4 years old, we were going some place, just the three of us (Tyler, Dad and I).  Dad mentioned wanting to stop some place to  take a smoke break.  Tyler piped up from the back seat, “Why do you smoke those things.  They smell like dirty socks.”  Dad could not argue that point.

 

Something about the love of a Grand Dad for his Grandson made a difference at that time for my dad.  He stopped cold turkey.  He filled the freezer with popcicles.  When he had a craving, he would grab a popcicle instead.  I remember he’d tell the grandkids to go get popcicles for him and themselves to share.  He never went back to it. 

 

He had to give up coffee before he went to the temple.  He had a lot of friends that still drank coffee.  After mom died, one of his dear friends from the ward and a home teaching companion, Eldon Frampton, had a chat with him about the Word of Wisdom one time when they were out visiting their assigned families.  He told him, if he could quit drinking coffee, he could go to the temple and be sealed to Mom.   His wife was Mom’s good friend for years and years before she passed away.    Dad committed to try to give up coffee.  He fell backward a few times.  First he started by not having coffee at home – Just at restaurants with friends.  Eventually, he made it and our family has since been sealed together for eternity.

 

 

 

 

Uncle Len’s Story in his own words:

 

By Len Mills

 

First I will tell you that I used to suck my two middle fingers, until one day I accidently skinned one of my fingers.  That forced me to suck only one of those fingers.  I guess I tell you this because it might have been one of the reasons that  I went to smoking so easily.  I sucked my finger until I was nearly 12 years old.     The family tried everything they could think of to get me to quit.  I remember that one of the things they tried was to put a rag filled with sugar around my finger and then attached it to my wrist. That didn't help one bit.  I liked the taste of that sugar.  Mavin, my older brother even tried slipping in at night while I was asleep and dumping  cayenne pepper on my fingers.  Needless to say they tried everything to get me to stop.  Nothing was working.  I knew I had to quit, I was getting too old to be sucking my finger.  So I made a splint that would go over my finger and the splint had sharp ends on it.  Those sharp ends would wake me up every time I tried to put my finger in my mouth. 

 

I finally quit but it wasn't long before I picked up another bad habit. I was not too bad of a kid so it made it really easy for my so called friends who were smoking but not wanting anyone to know it was them doing the crime.  They would have me carry their smokes for them.  No one would suspect me. I was a good kid, right.  By helping them this way they were always inviting me to go along with them.  I remember on one school break my friends invited me to go with them down into the furnace room and just when they were enjoying their cigarettes along comes the school custodian.  He reported us to the Principal and of  course we were ALL guilty.  I ended up getting kicked out of school right along with the rest of them. My friends never let up coaxing me to just try one.  One couldn't hurt me.  I stuck with my idea that I didn't need a cigarette.  My feeling was if that's what made them happy it was no skin off my nose.  I had all these friends who were willing to invite me along.  I was still covering for them somewhat.  I remember that one time I finally got tired of telling them "No thanks."  So I gave in and lit up a cigarette.  They were trying to teach me to inhale.  Big mistake.  I got so sick I slipped away and went down into the gym dressing room and laid on the floor all afternoon.  I thought I was going to die.  It was a terrible experience.  But sometimes those lessons we learn don't stick with us like they should. 

 

Later, when I had gone to Salt Lake City to work construction, I faced the same challenge.  The guys I was working with figured because I didn't use the smoke break that the company allowed us, that I should just keep on working.  Well needless to say, I wasn't having any of that, so I started to smoke right along with them.  

 

I met Deanna Webb in Tabiona, Utah while I happened to be out there with a friend, Ferrell Young.  He lived in Tabiona during his growing up years and then we became friends when my older brother, Glendon had met and  married Ferrell's sister.  We were spending the weekend  in Tabby and happened to be driving around checking out the girls in this small town.  Deanna also  happened to be driving around the town with her friends  looking for any cute guys. Ferrell later gave me Deanna's Salt Lake City address but he told me that she probably wouldn't go out with me if she knew that I smoked and drank.  I kept her address with me in my wallet until I had a chance to look her up in Salt Lake City.  When I finally got the courage to go see her, her aunt who she had been living with said "she's not here and I don't know nothing about her".  Turned out that she had quit her job and moved back to Tabiona.  It  was Thanksgiving time and because I was working construction and the weather had turned cold I was laid off and so I went back to Kingston for the winter.  I wasn't going to give up so easily and I just kept that address in my wallet.  I would take it out from time to time and just look at it.  I felt something different about this girl. 

 

In the spring I went back to Salt Lake to work for the same construction company and Deanna had moved back to Salt Lake to work again.  We talked on the phone and the Junior Prom was coming up the next weekend in Tabiona so of course I went To Tabiona.  I had been drinking a little with my friends and was a little nervous to ask her to dance with me.  I finally got up the courage to ask her to dance and wouldn't you know it, she ask me to sit her down once the set was over.  She said she was tired.  Some story, she was up and dancing just fine when the next number started.  

 

Back in Salt Lake much to my sorrow the Murray Police had gotten new radar.  Within a month I had gotten 3 tickets.  Two was for driving 35 in a 30 mile speed zone and one was for a 40 in a 30 mile speed zone.  I had to go before a judge and he restricted my drivers license so that I was only able to drive to work, during work and then home again.  Nothing more.  I still managed to work it out so I drove home by the place where Deanna was living at the time.  I never got my license back until after we were married. 

 

We dated for three months.  I remember that on our first date I took her to the movie North to Alaska.  I still love that movie. 

 

We had been married for over a year when Troy was born.  One Saturday I wasn't working and I happened to be sitting in a chair smoking.  Deanna had given Troy a bath and had put him in a little sun suit.  She came in where  I was sitting and laid Troy on a blanket on the floor in front of me.  I slipped out of the chair and got down where I could play with my son.  I tried to move the cigarette so that the smoke wouldn't keep curling up into my eyes and nose.  This wasn't working out too good.  I put the cigarette out and looked my little guy in the face and I told him he would never see his Dad smoking again.  With that promise I quit.  It wasn't always easy but I know it was worth it.  Deanna had never ask me to quit and I'm not sure why because I know she didn't like it.  I didn't quit because of Deanna but I quit for her.  I have never been sorry for that decision and none of my sons or anyone else has seen me smoke since. 

 

We were married in Tabiona by Bishop Thomas Fabrizio, August 19th 1961 and a year and a half later we were sealed in the St George, Utah Temple.  This was on April 13th 1963.  And my life has been blessed ever since.    

 

Cline’s Story as told to Valerie

 

I started smoking as a junior in high school.  One day, about everyone in Kingston who wasn’t at work was out picking potatoes.  And it rained right after lunch so you couldn’t get to the field so they shut everything down.  All the potatoes that were dug were put up.  On the edge of the field was 2-3 beehives.  So we went and got some newspaper and bark off the fence and rolled us some “cigarettes.”  The bees wasn’t too happy.  So we went and cracked the hive open, took a drag and then blew the smoke in the hive.  Before we knew it, we got some honeycomb.

 

It became a habit that continued for years.

 

Valerie:  When I was about 7 years old (1974), I had a lesson in Primary about the Word of Wisdom and when I got home, I asked my dad why he smoked if it wasn't good for his body.  He immediately quit smoking.  The trouble was that his break from tobacco only lasted 3 days.  Some co-workers told him about chewing tobacco and dad chewed from then until he quit in 2009.

 

I quit chewing after my 2^nd cancer scare.  It looked like I had cancer of the mouth.  When the biopsy came back negative, the doctor said, “Quit now!”  At the time, I had my eye on a new four wheeler.  I was spending $200 a month on tobacco, so I decided I would quit so I could buy me the ATV.  When I started chewing it was 35 cents a can and when I quit 35 years later, it was over $3.00 a can.  Once I set my mind to it, I quit cold turkey -  Gave away $120 in tobacco so if you know what a tight wad I am, you know how serious I was.  - Ok - I called him a "tight wad" when interviewing him for this story and he did not argue -

 

Two to three years earlier, I promised my grandson, Steven, that I would go through the temple when he did.  I kept that promise.  Steven and I went through the Oquirrh Mountain Temple together just before he left on his mission in August, 2010.

 

Valerie:  More was going on behind the scenes at this time.  When Uncle Len ordained my dad to the office of Elder in the Melchizedek Priesthood, Aunt Deanna mentioned that they had been praying for my dad that whole month.  Our family (Trent, the kids and I ) had as well.  We had been asked to think of someone to pray for that month and my dad had come to mind and from what Aunt Deanna shared, they had a similar experience.

 

Aunt Lorna Gail added this response:  "I don't remember too much about the two older brothers, but I do remember Len and Cline.  I remember them and their friends coming to our house and setting around that big round, wood table in the front room with their drinks and smokes. I asked mom why they always came to our house to do that and she said she would rather have them there so she knew they were safe.  I also remember them coming home and falling down the step into the bedroom or sleeping out on the lawn.  Mom always told them they could come to bed if they could get there, but she wasn't helping them.  My thinking was she was really saying, "If you are stupid enough to get yourself that drunk and smelly, you can get yourself to bed.  I'm not going to."  

I never knew of Lajune smoking or drinking and I never have had any desire to do either one either, thank heavens!  

I just want to say I am very proud of all four of my brothers.  They mastered their habit and I was so glad to get to go to the temple with them.  When Len went I was too young to go through, but I tended Troy while waiting for them to be sealed and Mavin, Glendon and Cline, I was so honored to be with them and stand proxy for Mom so they could be sealed.  That's an honor I'll always remember."